 Day 1
Weathered and ready for anything after an adventurous drive via Hwy 2 to Seattle. We finally arrived at our destination, Bumbershoot 2009. Albeit we were about half a day late, we sat into festival mode quickly.
Snacking on 6 dollar funnel cakes and sipping lemonade, we copped a squat near the Starbucks Stage around 4pm to check out Eric Hutchinson. While our attendance to his performance was brief I did get to hear him KILL Kanye’s “Heartless”
Whilst my counterparts here at CIOM are about seeing as many bands as possible in a day; I chose to really take in the vibe of the festivals true self. What is that? Trinkets and Trash. But after about an hour of signing petitions, hula hooping, and bartering with artists; I finally deployed myself to the Samsung Main stage for the only two shows that really mattered to me, at least for Saturday.
 The Saturday night show at Memorial Stadium kicked off with one my favorite country bands the Old 97’s. I was told prior to this that I had seen this band last year. I had no clear recollection of this, but now armed with a triple Americano I WAS READY!
To my surprise this would be the show where I would see the fewest people in Memorial Stadium all weekend long. I literally walked right up to the stage with no problem whatsoever. Are you kidding me Seattle? Ya’ll whine like bitches when Wilco stops in Spokane instead, yet you miss this? I don’t even own an Old 97’s record, but I sure as hell would not miss these guys.
As the Old 97’s wrapped up with a few of my favorites like “Timebomb” Memorial Stadium began to fill in just a little bit more for that evening headliner, The Queen of The Cougars: Miss Sheryl Crow!
HOLY SHIT! For real? Really? How did I know EVERY single song of hers? I was not aware of my super power of Sheryl Crow knowledge, but there I was raising my hands in the air to her almighty rock godessness. Yes, Rock Godesss. If you don’t believe me, maybe you should go see her in concert some time. She wears boots, plays guitar, plays bass, sings like a badass and she fucked Clapton. That alone makes her worth checking out!
Day 2
 So Sunday morning was kind of a bust. It was raining and I was all about hitting the complimentary buffet at my hotel. After stuffing my face with waffles, eggs and links I was ready to embark. Oh wait. It's still raining and we’ve got a long night ahead of us, but I’ll get to that later.
After cruising around the Seattle Metro for a few hours, I got back to the hotel and strolled on down to see the afternoon headliners the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s. While I was a little bumbed that they replaced the Ting Tings, I was stoked to see them since I only saw a touch of them at Sasquatch.
I rolled into Memorial Stadium solo. I was incredibly stoned and they were playing Head’s Will Roll as I hit the top of the stairs. I felt the beats hit my body like a shockwave and my eyes went quickly from left to right gazing at about 10 or 15 giant eyeballs floating like ice cubes in a sea of clapping hands.
I remember reading in The Stranger that they were something of a cocaine fueled dance party band. They said that mad them undesirable to see. Well, whatever to that hater. I say FUCK YEAH. Do some more coke if you need to and dance around. This shit was awesome.
 All good things come to an end and there I was sitting in the middle of the crowd not knowing were to go next. When there he was; DC. Last year it was all about the Smirnoff malt liquor, but this was 2009. A lot can happen in a year, and this was the year that I would learn about Chardonnay Bombs.
By this time I had reconvened with my group in the beer garden, this is when DC got us hip to the new Seattle craze created by the madman himself: The Chardonnay Bomb. Yes it’s exactly that. Wine and Rockstar. I was like “you’re fucking retarded DC” and he’s all “No. You’re retarded. Cause this shit’s awesome” And like that, I was pouring two glasses of 4 dollar wine into a giant glass of Rockstar.
I was then told to chug it all to get the full effect. Full effect? WTF. If this “full effect” makes you feel like you took heroin and crack at the same time...The Eagle has landed.
About 4 of these little fuckers had me ready to hit the head something fierce. But for the sake of journalism I held it to catch a little bit of Sera Cahoone. Well, that didn’t last long nature called and I split to let the dam breech.
 Full of energy drink, white wine and Budweiser’s, I finally emptied out in a filthy ass stall. Let’s just say I feel very bad for anybody who had to shit in this bathroom, because I think some people might have actually written their name with feces in one of the stalls.
After my quick lesson on why you take your own toiletries to a festival, I stumbled into the next beer garden to check out some vert ramp action. Bucky Lasek was skating, but I think he might have been having a rough day. Of course when 5 dudes fucked up on Chardonnay Bombs yell “what the fuck Bucky?” every single time he falls at the top of their lungs, it might make an impression.
By this time we were all pretty loaded. Sayra’s mom Barb brought a little bouncy ball which she decided to whip out in the middle of the Bumbershoot crossroads. What’s cooler than getting your picture with a chubby ginger kid with a free hugs sign and having photographers from Spin Magazine pop a couple of clicks? Have 10 people on Chardonnay Bombs chase a little ball for 20 minutes that draws more of crowd than the Old 97’s.
 After playtime, it was back to business. We made our way back into Memorial to see Michael Franti and Spearhead. Moments later DC took off to get shit ready for the night still ahead.
Sayra, Megan and Barb stuck around to watch Franti. While Joe Mama, Gus and I took off to see Holy Fuck. With a name like that, how could you not want to see these guys. About 20 minutes of Holy Fuck was all that I could really handle. While it’s cool as shit to see them live, running tapes through machines, whipping out Casio’s and yelling into mics on delay, it got old kinda fast. I will say this though, there drummer and bass player are SICK as FUCK!
Jason Mraz or Giant Curly Fries? I’ll take the later.
 That night was a night that I am sure everyone I was with will not remember well, but I’ll try and sum it up best I can. DC was a champ and invited us to the infamous Venom night club in Belltown. The dude went all out and got us a VIP Room with bottle service! Raphael Saddiq had the space next to ours. Seahawk Marcus Trufant’s handler spilled coke all over me and his pants. I really hate shrieking women in bachelorette parties. And I love my cousin Kamala.
After closing down Venom we rolled back to Lake Union to figure out who was going where! 10 folks jamming into a minivan couldn’t have been any funner. After an Indian history lesson from our taxi driver, Sayra, Kamala, Doug, Joe Mama and I tumbled into a car to take a trip to my cousin’s spot in the Queen Anne. We got up on the roof to gaze at the city lights. The view, the wine and family. Thanks Kam.
We rolled back to Lake Union at about 5am to call it a day!
 Day 3
Uhhhh. Fuck. Sayra got sick in the middle of the night. And I was shitting my brains out. Guess I should’ve taken Mraz over the Curly Fries that were cooked with oil that makes your insides come out. Needless to say, I needed a little rest time.
I finally crawled outta bed and took the walk to the venue one more time to make sure I at least saw the Black Eyed Peas.
The Peas had their shit together for a while. When I look back at this show I will remember two things. Make that three. One; According to Will.I.Am it didn’t rain because a dude named Sanford told him it wouldn’t. Two; Fergie is hot a shit, she can pee herself all she likes. And Three; I don’t remember how it sounded because half the show, the sound was OUT!
After BEP I was kinda confused. I think I was having some type of Chardonnay Bomb Flashback cause all I wanted to do was watch Bucky skate again. So I did that for about forty minutes. Nursed a couple drinks with Gus and Joe Mama and got ready for what would be the pentacle show for my weekend.
 Okay so I saw a few minutes of Franz and they are great and all. Modest Mouse? I’m not cool enough to get them. But Truckasaurus? That’s my shit. Add that they are playing in the Skychurch in The EMP? Word.
Who would win a cage match? Holy Fuck or Truckasaurus? Hands down Seattle’s own Truckasaurus.
Words cannot explain how mind blowing it is to see the visuals these guys have on the giant screens in the EMP. Deep beats from Comodore 64’s and Gameboys . Top it off with clips from Bloodsport, Ghostbusters and WWF and you’ve rounded out your weekend with a touch of what Bumbershoot is really about. The Arts in Seattle
Check out more photos from Bumbershoot [day 1] [day 2 & 3]
Jason@checkitoumusic.com |
